Pumpin Iron

A bunch of shit happened, then I was walking through a dark hallway with Zach Solomon. He went off down the hallway and I walked through a door that led to an outdoor pool. I was aware at this point that the pool was part of Western's campus. It was nighttime and I remember thinking it was cool that I could come out here and go night swimming if I wanted to at some point. Instead though, I went back inside through another door into the weight room. It was empty except for two or three machines and a dip bar, which was occupied by Levi Nelson and some other dude. I was surprised by the fact that the weight room had apparently shut down, and I asked them about it. They didn't seem to know. So I left and went up to the front desk to see what the deal was, I guess I really wanted to pump some iron. The front desk was a giant crescent shape and had about five or six pairs of employees sitting at computers all along the inside of it. I remember skipping over one alcove that contained an attractive girl in favor of one with a much more homely female, because I 'didn't want to deal with that shit'. So I said to her that, "I have two questions. One. Where is the weight-lifting equipment?" She said that they had moved the weight room because of liability issues, and that it would save us all some money in the economic crisis. She then spun the computer monitor around and made me fill out some forms to use the new weight room. As I was doing this she was telling me how to get to the new weight room. She said something to the effect of going up to north campus and walking down the road way to the end, or something like that. The only part I remember word for word is that she said I would "pass an impeccable power station". I did think this was slightly odd at the time.

meteors

I can't remember much about this one. Pretty much just the meteors.

So I was at some party at a house I've never actually seen, and it was nighttime. We all went out on the front deck to watch a meteor shower, but it was really cloudy. I asked which meteor shower it was and this guy kind of scoffed at my ignorance and told me "leonids dude". So then I pointed out that the sky was covered by clouds and we wouldn't be able to see anything, and this meteor expert guy scoffed again, like "pfff", but didn't say anything else, and everyone just kept looking upward. Then there was a kind of flash behind what looked like a thin layer of cloud, and the clouds kind of opened up. Then there was a flurry of probably hundreds of meteors right in that little cloud opening, and as more fired off the hold would widen in the sky until it was pretty big. I couldn't see very well so I climbed onto this bench thing and was holding on to the edge of the roof by putting my hand in this little hole. I almost fell a couple times and my hand would have been stuck in the hold and probably broke, but I just left it there anyway, I guess I was willing to take the risk. Gretchen was the only person there that I knew, and she had on the shiny jacket that I commented on the other night, and she was crying because she was so scared that the meteors were "in our atmosphere" and I was thinking 'that's basically just the definition of a meteor and isn't scary at all.' So here's the picture that I know gave my imagination the idea for the clouds opening up. It's called a 'punch hole' cloud and it's caused by a pocket of cold air falling through an otherwise regular high-altitude layer of clouds.

more rides

I don't even really like rides at carnivals and stuff. I don't know why the hell I'm always dreaming about them.

All I remember is the very end of this dream. I was with some girl who was about 12, and a real brat. I think she was supposed to be my little cousin who I was taking around the carnival. She had a huge bag of Halloween style hershey's kisses with almonds. The ones wrapped in orange foil. We got on a ride that was basically a ferris wheel, but instead of hanging seats that stayed upright, the seats were solid and went upside down as the wheel spun. There was no way to strap in at all, the only way to keep yourself in the seat was to push yourself downward into the seat using a bar that was above your head. I distinctly remember the sensation of doing this, and it was about all the arm strength I could muster not to just fly out of the chair while the ride was moving. I just couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong, because it was clear this ride would have already killed people, especially 12-year-olds, who lacked the arm strength to keep themselves safe. It was pretty much like sitting on a bench that would just fly through the air.

After the ride we joined pretty much my entire family at a long table for breakfast, which was a bunch of delicious looking pastries. My bratty cousin stopped at the prize counter to exchange some tickets for crappy stickers or whatever and I was happy to leave her there.

Amusement Park McDonalds / Downtown North Bend

I wrote this one down at 5:08 a.m. in my notebook, and when I first awoke I felt very rested and thought it was 5:08 p.m. and that I had drastically overslept again. I chalked this up to some terminal illness I was sure I must have and was worried about it until I woke up enough to realize what was really going on.

I went to some amusement park that had a built-in McDonald's with Rosie and my brother and some other person. We had to split up into pairs and for some reason I was not allowed to be with Rosie. So I went with my brother and she stayed with some fella who was tiny but had a very old face - beardy. I was only slightly bothered by this scenario at the time.

My brother and I bought some food at McDonald's before 'going on rides'. It took me about five minutes to halfway fill an enormous cup that I was holding with black cherry 7-up, which I'm pretty sure doesn't exist and sounds terrible. The machine barely put out any soda and was broken in such a way that it misted all over my hands and face when I operated it. When I could take no more of this and decided my oversize cup was full enough I went to the bathroom to wash myself off, my hands and face were stained a very dark purple. There was a janitor in there with a backpack vacuum and no toilets or anything, just a long wall with about 50 sinks lining it. The purple stains came off easily.

Now I'm in downtown north bend with a small crowd of my friends including Grayson and Gerard. It's not quite like real north bend, but close. I wanted to leave the group and go home for some reason. Gerard suddenly tells me to go get everyone some sodas and "bitch snacks" which I guess was meant to insult me. I was angry but said, "of course, you all wait right here, don't move" then started walking off with no intention of returning. I walked toward a trolley which I guess would take me home. I waved it down but realized it was going to the wrong direction and kind of waved it off. As I did this I realized that the driver was a girl whose appearance was hideous beyond reason. I could see in her ugly sad eyes that she thought I flagged down the trolley then decided not to get on because of her face, and I felt bad about it.

I'm feel like I'm nearly back to my house now and I'm in this old bookstore that carries mostly back issues of National Geographic. It's a small store but it's full of women in bikinis, and there are a lot of mirrors around leaning up against shelves and stuff. I was kind of trying to check out some ladies in these mirrors but they are all deformed or misshapen in some way. I can't see any of their faces, just weird messed up bodies. I can hear that some have speech impediments or sound like they're talking with their mouths full. I see Rosie, dressed normally in blue, exiting through a turnstile in the direction I'm heading with the guy from the amusement park. He's about 5' 2" and has a pretty serious beard, average looking overall. I can immediately tell that there is a level of interaction between the two that is bordering inappropriate. Instead of yelling to get her attention I decide to navigate through the dense crowd of disfigured women up to her, and to seize the opportunity to watch them interact with each other for a few moments.

The turnstiles exit into a big natural bowl-shaped area, kind of like a mini gorge. It's tiered on the way up and has semi-natural stone steps climbing up the sides. I accost Rosie but in doing to interrupt something that her and small beard were about to do. She looks guilty but realizes she must commence what her and small beard have already began. Small beard backs up about 30 feet, runs at her as if to tackle her but she puts her arms up and deflects him and he falls. As this is happening I'm walking off to the side with the two other people she was with. They sit on the stone steps about five steps up and I join them, but as I do I realize that they were seeking privacy. They seem to be a couple in an argument.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Rosie throw a baseball at us. The baseball approaches in kind of slow motion matrix-style, and hits the male of the two friends on the steps, who I'm still sitting next to. It hits him right in the jaw and the whole mini amphitheatre lets out an 'ooooohh' because it looked like it hurt really bad and was a pretty terrible thing to do.
I climbed down the steps to get away from the injured and arguing couple. As I did I watched Rosie retrieve and throw the baseball a few more times, very nearly hitting more people each time.

I'm laying on my back and pull out my phone - I got two text messages from Sean about his new chickens in Wenatchee. Instead of just reading them I'm kind of transported there. My whole vision is like a picture slide show and it's narrated by Sean. The chickens which Sean described as, "too cute" were not at all and looked like devil-spawn sacks of bone with hanging skin and leathery wings. I stopped reading the messages and faded back into the grass bowl, noticing that people were pointing at me and talking about me doing something 'agent style'.

Fallout Dream

This dream was interjected with unrelated pieces, but the main theme was clearly inspired by fallout. I was in a desolate wasteland, and I think I was in the military. People I was working with kept referring to "my science" in a kind of patronizing way. I think I was the scientist for this military establishment, and they all had a very negative opinion of science because the world had already been ravaged by nuclear warfare.

At some point I was in a hardware store shopping for some kind of supplies, and when an old lady asked if I needed help finding anything I told her I was looking for tissue paper to conceal the more sinister supplies I was actually after. I can't really remember what those were. Well the old lady and I somehow started talking about tulips and I asked her if she had ever been to the tulip festival in Mount Vernon. She said she hadn't then tried to hold my hand. I figured I must have done something to give her the wrong impression and make her think I was into her even though she was about sixty. I felt bad so I just kind of let it happen and we walked off.

We were now outside the store heading to a warehouse. The old lady was no longer a hardware store employee, but was some high-ranking officer in whatever military I was a part of - kind of. I think it was a little like Riddley Walker. We had a military, but it was post-fallout, and it had a certain degree of mysticism, and felt a lot more tribal than the military that you're probably imagining. I think that this woman was the seer for our squad or something like that. Anyway, as we're walking there are these huge smokestacks off in the distance and they're spewing out ungodly amounts of thick brown smoke. But it's really windy outside, it looks like the midwest, just a huge flat field of brown dirt. It was very brown. But I understood that it was just because everything had been levelled by bombs. So the wind was making the smoke from these smokestacks rush upward really fast, and dance around in such a way that it looked just like we were watching them operate in fast forward, and I was really enthralled with this. I asked the old lady (who was much younger now) what those factories were doing, and she kind of bitingly told me to figure it out with "my science".

We got back to the warehouse we were heading to, a hangar I suppose, and there were a lot of characters from earlier in my dream that had in some way defected and were chained to desks inside the warehouse, which also had some helicopters and airplanes and other war-related things. I wish I could remember the dream more completely because I know that it was more cohesive than I'm describing it. These characters already had a history in the dream before I saw them as captives, so I was able to understand that they weren't necessarily bad people, and that I was maybe on the side of this that was evil. A guy that I knew from earlier in the dream tried to stab me in the calf with a blunt screwdriver as I walked by. It didn't pierce the skin but he told me he just wasn't done building his shank yet, and that he definitely would have stabbed me. The last desk I walked buy was occupied by a guy dressed in blood-soaked army fatigues, and a mask that looked something like the one from phantom of the opera, but scarier and bloodier. He was really terrifying. He had a shank that was complete - it was basically a very sharp screwdriver about 16 inches long, and he started ferociously attacking me. I was trying to just keep the thing away from my neck, and a couple times it touched my neck but I managed to get it away. After a pretty long struggle my old friend with the blunt screwdriver came through for me and stabbed the guy in the chest a few times, and I watched in slow motion as blood came out of his mouth and he collapsed on the floor. I picked up the long shank and was now watching myself in the third person. I was wearing the phantom mask for some reason, and I was swinging the weapon around at nothing. Since I was now viewing this in the third person I was able to realize I was swinging at nothing, but I could also see what I thought I was swinging at which was this deformed cat creature with tattoos all over the inside of its mouth.

After the imaginary battle was over I was in a back room with the old lady who was not old at all anymore, and she was just laughing at me as I drew a picture of the cat creature on the wall and described what I had been hallucinating. I was really frustrated that she wasn't taking this more seriously.

Someone Was Trying to Kill Me

The beginning and end of this dream are the parts that I remember in the least detail, so they don't seem to make any sense.  Maybe they never did.

I started out at this rec center kind of place, except it was all swimming pools, and it was multi-story.  The building was mostly made of glass, and looking back it was incredibly beautiful, but I didn't really appreciate it then.

I remember going back to the lower-level pool at a certain time each day, and nerdy Nate from my chem class last year was always there.  He was in a wheelchair, and had obviously lost the ability to use his legs.  His personality seemed to be pretty accurate to reality, except that now he was really gung-ho about physical activity, like he just couldn't wait to get in the mix.  I chalked this up to his disability.  We were in an all glass waiting area waiting to get in the pool, there must have been some kind of closed thing going on until a certain time.  So anyway, the second we were allowed to get in the pool, Nate leaped out of his wheelchair and sprinted into the pool room and ran around the pool.  This didnt' surprise me at all, because I knew that at this point his arms were the limbs that were crippled, not his legs.  I don't know if I recognized in the dream that it switched; I don't think I did.

I was turned off by his excitement, and decided to go upstairs to the upper-level pool.  I had to walk up a staircase and at the top show an employee my card or some interaction similar to that.  They dynamic between me and the employee was a parallel of the dynamic between me and Dorothy at the dining hall, I could tell this person loved me.  But in this case he was an older mexican guy in a beige kind of jumpsuit.  The pool was insane looking.  It was all on the second story, and the stairs led up right in the middle of the pool.  There were little nooks to go sit and relax in, and on the far end of the pool, there was an ocean view.  Since the whole pool was made of glass and the water was flush with the sides, it was supposed to blur the line between where the pool ended and the ocean began.  On this far side of the pool there was a wave machine, and I was enjoying boosting myself up as high as possible when a wave went by, so that all I could see was the ocean and these mountain ranges covered in snow.

So after that I was hanging out in a nook with three other people, I don't have any idea who they were.  I was in one of the kind of beige jumpsuits, and there was a number 14 on my right shoulder, but it was digital somehow, like on an alarm clock.  The guys I was sitting with suggested that this meant the mexican guy at the entrance wanted to kill me.  I calmly explained that this was impossible, because the guy loved me.  We looked over to the guy, who was nearby, and he pulled out a bible and read a verse that said something to the effect of "bury the bodies of 17 people".  When he had finished reading, he pointed at me and said 14, then to my friends in succession saying 15, 16, and 17.  It wasn't as scary just then as it sounds now.

Now the dream jumps to a strange little apartment / office place, and the person trying to kill me had become my cousin Joe.  I was there with my aunt and uncle Bonnie and Alan, my cousin, and a girl and her boyfriend, both of whom I think were fictional.  The girl might have been Lindsey Beach.  So I was in this bedroom basically, but I was thinking about the movie panic room, and how great it would be to have one of them, and there was kind of a monologue in my head describing the panic room and why we needed it, even though it was clear we didn't have one.  In my head I was talking about the impossible-to-break metal door, but in reality it was this tiny flimsy white wooden door.  There was something going on with twizzlers at this point, they were locking the door but not doing a very good job or something crazy.

I heard someone rustling around outside, and I was sure it was my cousin planning to come in and kill me, and i looked around for a weapon.  I remember really assessing my whole environment to try to give myself  an advantage in the ensuing battle.  I settled on a nearby vacuum as a weapon, and I imagined, multiple times, beating him to death with it.  The rustling had by this point stopped, and I cracked open the door to see what was going on out there.  I saw the girl and her boyfriend, they had decided to sneak out and take showers, and just try to be quiet and not wake up the guy who had verbally told us all he was going to kill us.  I thought they were so stupid.  So then the girl looked into the bedroom where my aunt and uncle were to check on them, and looked at me with a worried look and said that "he's in there."  I said, "You're kidding right?" because I thought they were taking this situation way too lightly as it was, and it wouldn't have surprised me.  I looked in the bedroom for myself, and sure enough my aunt and uncle were asleep on the bed and my cousin was in the corner looking through old photos with a half-empty bottle of some lemon-flavored hard A.  A small fight followed where I punched and tackled him and got him on his back.  

The connection here is pretty much gone, but shortly after tackling him, he turned into Kristen.  This wasn't really a good thing, since the body was the only thing that had changed, Kristen now wanted to kill me.  My aunt was the only other one in the room at this point, and even though I knew Kristen wanted to kill me, I also knew that I was supposed to leave these two alone - girl stuff.  So I got up to leave and Kristen was acting super strange, kind of jumping on the bed in her underwear - which said something about being 21 on them - and just being creepy.

Once I left the room I was a different guy, viewing myself in the third person.  I was in my underwear (or this guy I was watching was at least) and I went out to the deck of the house, it was now broad daylight, and did something silly to make my family laugh then I put on pants and we were all pretty happy and not worried about much, we might have been having a barbecue.

Lucid Dream

I don't remember any of the surrounding events in this dream, only the small portion in which I was lucid.

I was walking around a residential area with Nate at night. It was kind of like Jake's neighborhood; very wide streets, nice houses. I was ahead of Nate on the street, and something tipped me off that I was dreaming. It may have been that I was drifting in and out of sleep (I was on a not very comfortable bed at the cabin) but I turned around and let dream Nate know that I knew I was dreaming. He wasn't very happy about this, he looked pretty displeased when I told him, and it unsettled me. I was afraid that I wouldn't have full control over what was going on, mostly because Nate had this kind of crazy look in his eyes. He picked up one of those newspaper dispensers from the sidewalk and threw it at me. While he was doing this, I told him to, kind of to assure myself I was in control even though I knew I hadn't planned this event. I continued to act as if I had, and I punched the large metal object out of midair, which sounded like a pretty fun, lucid thing to do. But I was still pretty worried in the back of my mind, and I didn't destroy the thing like I planned. I dented it pretty well, much more than I would ever be able to in real life, but it kind of hurt my hand.

I could feel that the dream was fading at this point, and I stepped back from Nate a little ways, and I started levitating into the air. I was able to do this successfully, but I didn't have full control over it, and I was still pretty worried about falling and stuff since I didn't have much control.

I guess I probably wasn't fully lucid. I knew I was dreaming, but I wasn't thinking completely clearly. The fact that I almost completely forgot this all happened contests to that probably being true. But it was an interesting experience nonetheless, and the closest call with lucidity that I have had, to my recollection.

Magic Match

This is only a tiny piece of the dream, the rest I've forgotten.

I saw my ex-girlfriend in an elevator at the mall. We were both employees I think, but it was kind of like the salish even though it was a mall. She was nice to me, which surprised me, so when I was leaving the elevator I wanted to say something nice in return - extend an olive branch - but the words came out really scrambled and slurred. I didn't try to correct them, I just left anyway.
Later in the dream I somehow acquired this match that had some kind of power. The red striking surface on one side had crumbled off, and the other side had kind of a tapered gray tip on it.



I could take this match with the gray side up, hold it near a wall, and close my eyes and my vision would be completely gray with white crosshairs in the middle. If I then blew on the match and kind of crossed my eyes, I would teleport through the wall. I did this a couple times, and it really got me out of trouble somehow. Later in the dream a black guy with white stubble, perhaps a famous actor, started pursuing me because of this match. I think he was from a magician's guild or something and I was misusing this artifact. Anyway, I was trying to flee from him using the match, but I couldn't concentrate or it ran out of juice or something, because I couldn't teleport out of the elevator as it shot upwards in this giant glass building. That's about it.

Faraway Beach

I was at a giant beach on the ocean, and I was under the impression that it was really far away, like on some island in some corner of the world. But I was also under the impression that it was a school-related trip, and there were about 500 other people there, supposedly all from high school. The beach was a big slope, kind of a bowl shape, and there were people covering all the slopes. For some reason I was kind of building this megastructure just out in the water, but I was building it like you build roller coasters in roller coaster tycoon, where that you're about to build is kind of transparent, then you click and it builds instantly. I was doing some kind of 'click' and the pieces of a rollercoaster/freeway were building. One of the pieces was a bridge that went to the horizon and out of sight, just ridiculously long.

After I was finished with this I figured I could go play, and I somehow got a blue boogie board. Zach disappeared pretty instantly, and I remember being pretty annoyed because I was sure that I would never be able to find him again, there were so many people here. So I took my boogie board and I jumped in the water and played a little bit, then I got out for some reason. I started trudging up the sand hill, and near the top found callie hanging out with some 'juniors' that don't exist. The sun was setting and the whole ocean looked red, it was really beautiful. I took my shirt off and was going to leave it with her and go play in the ocean more. I was really concerned about my shirt and towel, because there seemed to be nowhere safe to leave it, and I couldn't believe no one was worried about that. So I gave that to her and we started joking around about something, I can't really remember the conversation. But basically I ended up saying really arrogant things as a joke, but they didn't get it, and callie turned her back to me and said seriously that one of her friends, who was named 'dokta tre' could take me. I looked at the guy and he was clearly pleased that she thought so, that he had such a badass reputation, but I was mad because he was just tiny. Anyway, at that point Sean Robinson, the red haired nerdy kid, had taken my boogie board and was trying to surf down the sand hill on it. I ran around the other side of this structure that was between us to intercept him, which I did, and I snatched my board back, really pissed off. The people he had just run into were pissed off too because they were loading a bowl and he smacked into them.

So I went back down to get back in the water, but I don't think I ever did. Zach and I had laid our towels out far to the side, and close to the ocean. A little too close because the tide had come up and soaked them as well as covered them with sand. I shook them out, and thought that it was lucky I even found them because they were so buried. At this point I saw a deer and fawn, and pointed them out to a person near me. I remember repeating, 'just look around you' like in those videos, and thinking of those videos while I said it. Then I kept looking around me and finding the strangest stuff. It was dark out now, and there were these firework type things falling from the sky all around. There were also these weird lights that were nothing like car headlights on a freeway, but that turned into car headlights on a freeway when someone told me that's what they were. I didn't want to get in the water at this point, I was just worried about that night, where we were going to sleep and all that kind of stuff, I was pretty upset about how poorly planned this all was. There were still hundreds of people in the water, and they were moving like a single unit, except for one guy who was trying to surf all the way down the beach, like when you just surf on the tiny bit of water right where it meets the beach, and someone had a big flood light to help him out. That's about all I remember.

Vehicle Emissions Testing

I was at my house late at night, and it was kind of a party atmosphere. There were a lot of people there, they seemed to be mostly my extended family, but some of them were people from "school" that I apparently knew, though they were in their thirties for the most part. I was pretty upset about everyone being there, and I wanted them all to leave but I realized that it was about 6:30 pm, even though it felt and looked like about 1 in the morning. I went downstairs and grabbed a cup and was going to pee in it, but then my cousin Joe walked up and I decided to fill it with water to cover up the fact that I was going to urinate in it. He was leaving I guess, and I went outside to the garage with him, and upon seeing my car he asked if I had ever put my vehicle through emissions testing. I said no, and he replied, "Well you know that 'socket cleaner' that your dad puts in your cars that makes them run perfectly?" I did know of that stuff in this dream. He went on to say that he put some of it in his car, and it made it not pass emissions testing. As a result, he has to ride his bike for one full year while they do diagnostics on his car at the emissions center. Also, he has to go into the place every day on his bike and do time trials on his bike. He told me that when he arrives, they start screaming at him to "warm up" then he has to ride for a half hour and get under the "baseline" time. I told him it sounded like he was getting pretty fit. He pulled out of the driveway on his bicycle, and I got in my car and drove up the hill between my driveways, which had snow on it. I was worried I would slide back down the hill, but I made it. Once I got to the top, I wanted to do a burnout down the street. I prepared to do so, but now I was on my bike and not in my car. I didn't notice this, so I was trying to burnout anyway, and the method to do so in my car is to hold in the clutch, rev it up, then let it go. So I was holding the front brake and trying to pedal, then I let it go, and successfully burned out a little bit. I caught up to Joe and started riding with him, and JM caught up to us a little later.

Now it's daytime again, which didn't surprise me because I knew that Joe's house was about a 40 minute drive from mine, and we were on our bikes. So we were riding through this baseball complex that seemed to be in the middle of a fairly large city, and everyone on every team was mad at Joe, and me too because I was with him. About this point the dream became a "classic gangster movie", but not classic like Al Pacino, classic like eight mile, which really is not classic at all. In the dream I guess enough time had passed for this type of movie to be classic. Grayson and I were narrating over the happenings in the movie, but I was still in the movie, and I certainly wasn't exempt from the bad things that were happening. But I was able to objectively narrate over the whole ordeal. So as we were riding through this place, everyone was yelling at us, and at least one person from each time was throwing softballs at us. Every time someone would start throwing softballs, the screen would freeze on them for a second, and their name or names would appear below them on the screen in red block letters. Most of the balls were coming at me, and once one of them bounced and hit me in the head. I was mad and stopped and returned fire to the guy, who was about three times my size. I nailed him, and got really scared he was going to come kill me. Just then though, a cop came who was even bigger than this guy, and walked up and smacked him in the head. I was so happy the authorities were on our side. We kept riding. As we were riding away, the screen zoomed in on the brawl that ensued after the cop hit the guy. Grayson and I continued to narrate on how we understood how classic this movie was, but we just didn't like it still.

Spilled Milk / Popcorn Mail / Zombie Show

Spilled Milk -

I don't remember this one very vividly, but Grayson and Zach were at my house, and we were sitting at the counter, I think eating cereal, and Grayson spilled a bunch of milk on the kitchen table. Him and Zach were up and near the table for some reason, while I was watching from some distance. I was warning them that it was dripping off onto the floor, but every time I said anything, Grayson just got really pissed off that I wasn't the one cleaning it up. I thought this was absurd, but as the milk spread across the entire floor (The amount of milk was just multiplying, it was completely impossible) I decided to grab some paper towels and take care of it. As I passed Grayson to mop up the milk that was finding its way down the hallway toward the front door, I stood up slightly to whisper in his ear, "Fuck you". I guess I was really pissed off. This made him livid, and he started screaming about fighting me, swearing and all. My parents were in the living room watching TV, and I just remember wishing he would keep it down for that reason. Multiple times he threatened to "Throw a brick at my crotch".

Popcorn Mail-

I was in what looked basically like a telephone booth, but it was perched on top of a cliff or something, I think I had to traverse many stairs and rickety bridges to get there. Inside was a vat filled with ice, but it was supposed to be popcorn. I was communicating with some voice who didn't have a body to represent it, but this wasn't weird at all at the time. The voice and I were talking about how much salt to put on the popcorn, and how sometimes people put too much. There was a pitcher next to all the ice full of a yellow powder, it was butter-flavored salt or something. I poured a reasonable amount in, and started shaking the vat around to spread it out. I wasn't satisfied with the distribution of it, because since this was ice and not popcorn, the salt was sticking mostly to the pieces that I poured it directly on, since it was kind of melting. I picked up the entire tub out of its place in the table and shook it vigorously, I remember there being some kind of foreign object in there that I wished wasn't in the way messing up the salt, I think it was a straw hat. Then the popcorn lady came by, but she was clearly in a mail truck, and I kind of understood that the mail lady dealt with this popcorn. She poured probably a gallon jug full of white salt in through a slot into the ice-corn, then even a little more. I was appalled, and so was the bodiless voice. Then I ate some that had only my salt on it, since hers was mounded near the mail slot. It was really good, and cold, and salty. The mail lady asked me to pass her some through the slot, so I gave her some, again from the side that only had my salt. She really enjoyed it, and I thought why the hell did she put so much salt on there?

Zombie Show -

I was on my dual-recliner couch in the extra bedroom at Jamie's house, watching TV. Every time a commercial would come on, I would step outside and drink some beer in the yard. It was about 1 AM, and my mom was sleeping in a lawn chair in the yard. The TV show and reality were very confused, one bled into the other a lot. The show I was watching had something to do with a zombie-like virus or something, kind of like 28 days later. This black woman was in a desert with her son who was about 5 years old. He was running around, and I think she was just trying to catch him, but she somehow contracted the virus, really out of nowhere, and to demonstrate this the camera zoomed in on her eyes and they crossed then uncrossed, and she started walking like a zombie. She ran into a bunch of cacti and her face was bleeding. At this point I was watching the whole thing in "reality" outside Jamie's house, and the little boy was just outside of a cactus grove that should have been Jamie's yard, and standing in the gravel street facing the road. It was dark, so we didn't notice until the mom reached him that his entire head was shredded flesh and he was covered in blood. This was enough for the mom to get over the virus I guess, and she started mourning her son. I'm not sure if he was dead, but probably. I decided not to drink any more beers and go inside, and I was confused as to whether or not I should rewind the show tivo style, because I was having trouble judging how long I was outside, but a different show seemed to be on. This is probably because the other show was happening outside. Then I started wondering why I wandered outside every commercial instead of just fast-forwarding through the commercials. Then I woke up.

Fingernails / Van Theft

Fingernails -

I was taking an extended nap on my couch, and I dreamt that I woke up on my couch to find that the fingernails on both my hands had been painted with purple nail polish. I knew right away that it was a joke that had been played on my, and that either Cat or Kristen had done the actual painting. I remember being on the phone with Zach, and asking him which of the two it was that actually did the deed, which makes no sense, because Zach lives in Pullman, and would have no way of knowing the haps up here.

Van Theft -

I was driving my van past the mini storage, toward Grayson's house, and I parked it by that millwork outlet building, and walked the rest of the way up that little hill, my goal was to get to a high point, so my cell phone would get reception, and I could recieve a text message that I knew had been sent to me. I got to the top of the hill, got the text message, then realized that there were two figures running away from the van into the darkness. I instantly knew that these two characters had broken into my van. I started running back to catch them, but I knew it was futile, they were running too, and they were already a half mile ahead of me. I noticed as I was running a third man standing near the van with a German Shepherd on a leash, but I could tell he was just jogging, and wasn't planning on stealing anything. I was kind of frightened of his dog though, so I kind of ran sideways up the bank on one side of the road and grabbed a fairly large rock. When I reached the man and his dog, I threw the rock near them to distract the dog while I checked the damage on the van. One side window was broken, and there was a ton of stuff in there I had never seen, and I was sure some of it must be missing, though all of it was unfamiliar. I took the van to the mini storage and my mom and I started looking through it to assess my losses. As we were looking through it, I kept finding weed pipes, and I would have to deftly hide them from my mom. I would pretend I was just checking the contents of a drawer, and I would stash a pipe in it. Then I'd find another, and another, and had to keep hiding them. I don't know how I managed it, they were everywhere.

Lacrosse

I waited too long to write this one down, I remember very little of it at this point. I recall maybe joining a lacrosse club or something, it was a club instead of a team because I had no lacrosse experience, so it seemed like the right choice. A lot of stuff happened now that I don't remember, the next thing I recall is being in a gym in lacrosse gear and doing warmups with the rest of the lacrosse team. We were standing in no particular order all over the gym, and throwing the ball to a random person who would catch it and throw it off again. In between some of the throws we would drop onto the ground on our stomachs as a sort of warm up. I was getting worried now, and started telling the people around me that I was maybe in the wrong place, because I was thinking someone would teach me to throw a lacrosse ball before expecting me to do it. No one seemed to notice or care. The game started soon, and I told someone I had to pee so I could avoid being put in the game. I left the gym and walked down a hill to a giant mansion, where I decided to look for a bathroom to use. There was a red car parked outside, and I somehow knew that there were a couple guys inside robbing the place. I went in anyway. When I saw them, I got pretty worried, since I was going to be a witness to their robbery, but they were more helpful than my teammates, and directed me to a bathroom. I went in there, and didn't really have much to do, I don't think I went pee, but I remember sitting on the toilet and realizing that I was dreaming. I don't remember what tipped me off, I think I was sitting there thinking to myself about how I didn't want to go back to lacrosse, and then realizing that I didn't have to go back, that I didn't really play lacrosse. I jumped up, my mind was racing trying to figure out what I wanted to do, the bathroom was still real, but I was worried it would slip away, so I quickly decided to open the door and fly off. When I realized I was dreaming, I got so excited I could feel it in my guts, you know that feeling. I grabbed for the bathroom door handle to fly out of there, but I had some trouble getting it open, and the world started to fade around me, actually it was more like blinking on and off. I still wanted the flying sensation, so I flew around for a couple seconds in a white kind of mist, and didn't enjoy it all that much. I'm still skeptical that I truly became lucid, since I can't remember what tipped me off. I have a sneaking suspicion that what tipped me off was just as ridiculous as everything else, and that I was really lucid, just dreaming that I was. Either way, I woke up too quickly for it to be very cool.

Two Guys / Mike's Restaurant / Game? / Gerard

Two Guys -

I was walking with two girls, and we were out by ace hardware or something, or a place that was similar to that. Two guys walked by the other way, and I instantly didn't like them. They had on tight polo shirts with the collars popped up. One laughed just as he passed us, and I clearly and loudly mocked his laughter. They turned around and started threatening me for mocking them, and they were two big guys, who could have easily beaten me up. But I wasn't about to let go of my pride and just apologize, especially with these two girls I was with watching. So instead, I just started making more sarcastic quips in their direction. They were on the brink of "teaching me a lesson", as they said, and I responded that I was trying to "teach them a lesson, in how to gracefully take playful sarcasm". I guess it all worked out, because I never got beaten up, but I never backed down from them either. I remember feeling pretty proud, like I had a silver tongue for being able to get out of that situation unscathed, and still appear cool to these girls.

Mike's Restaurant -

This may be connected to the last dream, but I don't have a clue who I was with anymore. I was in my uncle mike's restaurant, but instead of a restaurant it was a grocery store, kind of like Fred Meyer, because I remember it had all sorts of plumbing supplies, clothes, furniture, and cheap ugly mass-produced paintings in cardboard boxes. The paintings were of stupid meaningless things, like an indian chief's head with a full moon and some wolves behind it, that kind of stuff. At one point my grandma was there, and she was talking about a red suede couch that she thought was great and wanted to buy. As she was talking about it, everything else faded out, and all I could see was the couch in a room by itself, with strange lighting that was evocative of a movie set. I don't remember much else that happened here, though I know more did.

Game? -

By far the weirdest of the three, but the most nonsensical and difficult to describe. It started with me being on a golf course. I don't remember what led up to this, but I know some stuff did come before. The golf course was enormous, it was as if the entire world was perfect green fairway grass, with the occasional tree, and the courses were just strewn about this green land end to end, they weren't in any way constructed to save space, or to consolidate them to one location. I was mostly watching other people golf, and from what I can recall, they were doing awful. Although I wasn't participating, i felt obligated to keep up with the group, and not fall behind. I kept seeing floating bubbles with cartoonish representations of food inside. I was able to leap great distances across this golf course and land safely, which was lucky for me because there was a small meter somewhere in my field of vision that was steadily depleting, and to raise it, I had to burst these bubbles with a pool cue that I had. I spotted one and leapt probably fifty feet in the air, landed and smacked the bubble, and my meter gained about a big chunk, about hald of its total. I saw another, and this time jumped high enough to worry myself about whether I could land without breaking a leg. I was fine, but the bubble this time was much harder to burst, and it took a few tries. Floating in the air, it looked like this:


I burst this open, replenished my meter, and quickly ran off to catch up with the group. At one point I hit a golf ball with a two iron and watched it sail almost perfectly straight down the fairway and about 15 times as far as anyone there had ever hit a ball. No one really noticed or said anything, but I figured I was the shit.
Now I was in a room that was just a giant cube. There seemed to be no way in or out of this box. It was about a third full of water, and just above the water line was a platform, with another platform above it, so there were two stories of platforms out of the water. There were two girls there again, but me and one of the girls were shrimp. We were swimming around in the water and trying to stay away from this carp that was trying to eat us. We were all very cartoonish versions of sea creatures, not very realistic. At some point the carp lost its exoskeleton, which it shouldn't have had in the first place, we were the crustaceans, and our goal became to keep it away from the carp, I guess without it he couldn't hurt us. a lot of chasing ensued, and it was very scary, I feared for my life. Near the end of it, Me and the girl, humans again, were sitting on the edge of the bottom ledge, feet in the water, and I could see the carp, now a crayfish, coming toward us. It latched onto my hand with its pincers, it hurt, but not too bad. I let him hold on, then I punched the wall with him between my fist and the wall. He burst open and died. The second girl climbed down from the top platform, telling us that to get out of this room and advance to the next level, we would have to take this tiny spear she had and drive it through the dead shrimp's heart. Me and the first girl both said, let's not be so hasty, and make sure this is the solution to the riddle, we don't want to be stuck in this cube forever. I opened a big poster that was I guess the instructions to the game we were playing / existing in. The game was all about the moon, and food. I had trouble understanding it, not surprisingly, but I came away with the impression that we could rocket this dead shrimp up to the moon as food, and that would increase our luck, or "karma". Now there was a third person, a guy, and we were all sitting on the bottom ledge, and I was looking through these cards that were about the size of quarters, that also had to do with this game. I got about halfway through the cards, and realized that down the side of them the alphabet was written, and I got worried that they would get mixed up. Now we were all at a table that had appeared on the bottom tier, and we were kind of playing D&D, I felt somewhat like the dungeon master, but there wasn't really a dungeon master in this particular game, everyone contributed to the story. But I was the best at the game, and teh most creative, so I was doing most of the talking. Soon, the guy started telling me a story of what had happened to them early on in the game, I guess before I got there. They had killed some monster of a high level, and he had dropped six demon-hide masks. They had no idea that this was a very good thing. They weren't masks at all, but six powerful monsters that would fight for you. They said they got tired of them, never realizing what they were worth, and decided to jam an enemy creature with ranged attacks behind an obstacle and let them kill their demon-hide masks. One of their players would repeatedly press 'P' on a keyboard, which allowed his next attack to be directed at a party member for damage, and attack the demon-hide masks. The masks killed him easily, and they finally realized what a force they had on their side.

Gerard -

I'm sure this was connected to the other dreams in some way, but I was in my trailer with Gerard and a couple other people, maybe even those guys that were going to beat me up earlier, and he said something about Lewis & Clark, about how stupid it was or something. I expressed confusion, and he responded with informing me that the college was no longer called Lewis & Clark, but "Cluck, Cluck, Cluck". That jogged my memory and I remembered that it had been renamed. I said, "Oh yeah, I heard about that. What a stupid name. I mean, Lewis & Clark was never all that good, but cluck cluck cluck is an awful name for a school. I'm glad I'm not going there".

Western

The Majority of this dream happened at what I thought was western, but I'm not sure if I knew that I was in my house for the first part of it. I woke up in my bed (in my dream) and walked downstairs to my living room, where there was a circle of about 6 people, mostly guys except for Lindsey Beach. I had forgotton to put on pants, and so I had a shirt and my underwear on, everyone else had pants on. I remember turning to I think Zach, who was on my right, and telling him that I just didn't know this was something that I was supposed to wear pants for. I was a little embarassed, but I got over it pretty quickly, and it helped that no one seemed to notice that I had forgotten my pants. We did some kind of an activity, it was like icebreaker activities we used to do in Key Club, it was very stupid. As soon as it was over, I went back upstairs to get some pants on. Instead of being in my house now though, I was in college at western, and my brain had concocted a giant room that was partially seperated by walls, I'm sure because I'm aware that I'll have suitemates and not just a roommate, however this arrangement was entirely impractical.
This entire structure was like a stone tower, we were at the top of it. There wasn't a complete roof, so it was open to the outside, and the stone was in disrepair, very crumbly and old. The yellow dot is Evan Dix, who I guess was my roommate, and he's who I talked to first. I went up to him and told him how I had forgotten my pants, and how funny I thought that was. His eyes were barely open, I think he was stoned, and he showed no sign that he found any humor in the situation. I looked down and realized I had my shorts on already. I didn't remember putting them on, but I figured I must have already done it and not realized it, and that's why Evan didn't see the humor in the situation. The green dots were a bunch of girls I didn't recognize, they were supposed to be my suitemates I guess, but it didn't really make sense since none of the walls closed in any rooms, the walls just kind of seperated what were supposed to be our individual rooms. The red dot was Evan's roommate when I went and saw him at western, and he was playing X Box, just like he was when I was really up there. I was embarassed that my story about forgetting my pants turned out not to be funny, because the girls were watching me from around the hot tub (the blue oval). Now it was breakfast time, and me, Grayson, and couple other people walked into a cafeteria I've never seen before. It was ridiculously well-stocked, and I commented to Grayson how the other meals sucked, but breakfast sure was amazing. I trolled around the cafeteria for a while and ended up sitting down with a styrofoam bowl full of what looked like chocolate soft-serve ice cream with a dallop of spaghetti sauce around the edges. Grayson had exactly the same meal, so it didn't make any sense when I became curious as to what the spaghetti sauce in Grayson's bowl might taste like. I stuck the back of my plastic fork in the sauce and stuck it in my mouth, and instantly realized that he wouldn't appreciate what I had just done. I said right away, "Sorry, that was kind of a gross thing to do". He confirmed that yes, it sure was, and that he hoped I wouldn't do it anymore. I didn't, and just sat there and ate all my meal, which was indeed ice cream with spaghetti sauce, and it was pretty gross. By the end of it though, I had learned to like it. After i finished, I went back into the main part of the cafeteria and started looking for a hot dog, someone had one and it looked good. I saw chicken and rice guy standing there with a chef hat on, and he had a plate of hamburgers and hot dogs. The hamburgers looked like chalky rags pressed into patties, and the cheese on top of them wasn't melted and was brittle and always falling off of them. I asked for a hot dog and he said something nonsensical and put a miniature hamburger on my plate. I told him that no, I wanted a hot dog, and he said something else nonsensical and put about 1/8 of one of the hotdogs on my plate, next to some pancakes I already had. I didn't have any idea where these miniature hamburgers and hot dogs were even coming from, they appeared nowhere on his plate, or why he thought I wanted these small versions of what I asked for. I went back and sat down, and made up some story where the guy said something about chicken and rice, which he never did, just to get a laugh out of the people I was sitting with.

House on Fire / Takhlakh and campsite

House on Fire -

I don't remember much of this one, but what I do remember is very strange. I think I was camping with my family, I think it was supposed to be takhlakh, but of course it looked nothing like it. There was a patch of grass on fire in front of the porch of this house that was next to our trailer. I went across with a fire extinguisher to put it out, but before I managed to, it spread and the porch of the house started to burn. Everyone at this point I guess decided it was a lost cause, and started to leave, prepared to let the house burn to the ground. I almost followed, but I guess I realized that it was a little early to make that decision, and I went back and put the fire out. My extinguisher was emitting a thick white foam that coated whatever I sprayed it on. Now the fence surrounding the house started to burn in a couple different places, I put those out, but fires started springing up randomly all around and on/in the house. The fires, though small in size, where creating an almost deafening roaring noise, so they weren't hard to find when they sprung up. I remember My mom and Whitney Beyerlin's dad helping me suit up to fight the fire in the back of our trailer, which was unrecognizable as such. I put a stack of newspaper around my body, then put on a black hooded sweatshirt, then unrolled tinfoil over the front of me to cover the sweatshirt, then I put on a fleece face covering, like a bandit, and put on the hood. I was so bundled up it was hard to move, kind of like when you have a lot of snow gear on, which is I think why there was now snow on the ground. I went back to fight the fire, and there were firefighters there now, but they were doing an awful job. They were only spraying water sometimes, and kind of messing around. I figured they probably hadn't checked if anyone was inside. So I ran inside, and indeed, there were three people and some dogs in there, waiting to be rescued. They could have ran out the door on their own power pretty easily, but I guess they just wanted to wait until someone showed up. Now I'm inside the burning house, but I feel no sense of urgency to get out. There are about 20 dogs now, and I'm trying to get them all out. As soon as I get most of them out the front door, more come back in through the back door. I can't manage to keep them all out at the same time. I decided to get most out, then shut the back door, and that seemed to work okay, I got them all out. Now I was back in the trailer, getting suited up again for some reason, and inspecting how Zach's newspaper covering was so much thicker than mine. This time I wasn't getting suited up to fight a fire I don't think, I put my cell phone in my hood, and it stayed pressed against my face even without my hand, since I had so much gear on. I used this opportunity to call Grayson, and tell him what was going on. He seemed a little pissed at me for no reason.

Takhlakh and Campsite -

These two may not have even been seperate dreams, but there's so much nonsense going on, that it just makes it easier to follow if i split it up.
I guess I was at Jamie's house, I think with Zach and some girls, but this was also Takhlakh I guess, somehow. I was really into one of the girls, and I was pretty sure she was into me. It wasn't anyone I know in real life, though everyone else there was. We all got into a pickup truck to head down the hill to a campsite, the feeling was that we could get away from Jamie and my mom and do some probably illegal or sexual stuff down there. I was late getting in the truck for some reason I cannot recall, and we started to head down. I remember being in the truck and bouncing down the gravel road, we were all just talking away, and no one seemed to be driving. Me and Zach were in the backseat, and 3 girls were up front, one of them Carol, one the chick I was into, and one other inconsequential one. I remember talking to zach about how much the gas was going to cost to drive down here, and he said it was 10 and 1/2 miles down, and 22 miles up. I doubted that was possible, but then conceded that there was a one way road down, and a one way road up, and that the down road was too steep to go back up. I don't know what we did down at the campsite, I don't even remember arriving, I just remember being back up at takhlakh/jamie's house and me and Zach wanting to leave agian, I guess the girls were still down there. This time we took a subaru outback, but halfway down, instead of being with Zach in a subaru I was with JM on the moped. He was driving. We got to the campsite, it was an oval-shaped loop, their campsite was near the back. We came around the loop at full speed, saw their campsite was empty, so we didn't slow down. JM went off the gravel loop, and into the grass at top speed. The turn almost made me fall off the moped, but now somehow instead of being behind JM, I was beside him, and was able to use him to brace my fall. JM now informed me that he was going to jump off without slowing down, and he wanted me to try to gain control of the moped before it crashed. I hated this idea, but didn't object. I thought that he was being too laid back about the moped. It was just a little weak thing, but you still shouldn't jump off anything while going 25 mph. He jumped off, and I didn't want to hit the ground until I slowed down, and luckily I was able to grab JM's hand, and as he dragged on the ground, I floated in the air, and slowed down enough to where I decided it would be safe to now try to grab the moped and stop it from crashing. It was a lost cause, and the moped crashed down, JM skidded across the ground ahead of me as I let go of his hand, and I landed deftly on both feet. JM trotted back towards me holding his arm, saying it hurt, but with a smile, obviously okay. I told him not to do that to my moped anymore, and he tried to tell me that it wasn't that harsh of a thing to do to it. I told him that dumping it on its side at its highest possible speed was indeed about the worst thing I could think to do to it. We got back on, me driving this time, and I warned JM to hold on during the corners, since I almost fell off. He didn't seem concerned. We pulled onto the main road, and at this point we both had our own mopeds somehow. We were riding down a pretty crowded sidewalk, but it wasn't a normal sidewalk, it was elevated and made of wood, like a really long park bench. as we rode there were planted trees on our left, then the main road, and a long semi truck trailer on our right. I kept almost falling to the right, but catching myself on the trailer. As we rode there was a dog with us, I think one of the dogs I saved earlier. Now there was a soaking wet polar bear on the other side of the trees to our left. My mind was bouncing back and forth between thinking this bear was dangerous, and just thinking it was cool to see. I never questioned why it was dripping wet, there was no water around as far as I could tell. Our dog was curious about the bear, and approached it, the driver of the semi truck got out and looked worried. Nothing bad happened, and we continued on our way. We got up to a very crowded intersection, and prepared to take the crosswalk across. A boy also waiting asked us if we had to wait longer, or something to that effect, since we were on mopeds and not on foot. I told him that no, they were 50cc, and were considered legally to be bicycles. We crossed, then crossed again, so were were on the opposite corner of the intersection. Here, Zach (no longer JM) sang this song to me: "I smoke cigarettes, but I wont be a real good reason why, / I can't be your 249cc scooter guy." He said something about his little sister and his backyard also, then my brother woke me up.

Grad School

Zach and I were both going to Grad School, except in my dream, 'Grad School' just meant that we both went back to Mount Si to take summer classes for college credit at a reduced cost. This would seem unpleasant because we'd have to deal with all the high schoolers going there (I don't know why they were there, it was summer, but the school was just as full as the middle of the school year), but there seemed to be a kind of unspoken agreement that none of the high schoolers could talk to us, so it really wasn't a problem. I was totally hitting on this one chick in the back corner of one of the classrooms during class, I was waiting for her to finish what she was doing so we could walk out together, but she was taking forever. I glanced at the clock, and it said 10:77. It occurred to me that this was incorrect, so I did a double-take, and this time it read 10:46. This is such a classic lucid dream trigger, but I didn't notice that it was strange in my dream. I asked her what was taking her so long, and she said she had to stay and do this project. I said I had to go. She said not yet, let me give you my number first. This was the response I was fishing for, and I was very happy to have recieved it. She started looking around her desk, which was a mess with ripped-up papers, for a scrap to write her number on. I was about to point out what I thought was a correct-sized piece for a phone number, but she grabbed a much larger one, and started writing a bunch of stuff on it. Then she grabbed the small one I was looking at and wrote a little more on it, and handed them both to me. I read them right there, and they were almost completely incoherent. Saying something about her mom maybe, and just a lot of other weird stuff, not complete sentences. Somehow I got the basic idea, that she was telling me not to call her if I wanted to get laid, just to be her boyfriend. At this point in our interaction, the teacher, who was still teaching the class, asked me what I was still doing in there, all the other grad students, including Zach, had already left. Just then, Zach walked back in carrying a giant inflatable pencil that was flat on one side, so that it was a long semicircle shape, as if it had been sliced in half down the middle, he gave this to the teacher, who absolutely loved it. I was a little pissed about it, Zach had been sucking up to this teacher all day, and I thought she was kind of a crappy teacher. After conversing with the girl a little more about the meaning of the note she wrote me, I told her that yeah, no problem, I'd be her boyfriend, but in my mind I was very put out that I might have to make a committment, and was thinking I probably wouldn't do it, or maybe I'd pretend like I was going to do it just long enough to get laid. I got up and threw a pillow I was sitting on behind me and walked quickly out of the room. On my way back to my car, walking through the school, I saw two students pushing a janitor's cart and really having a good time. I wanted to stop and lecture them on how good these high school days were, and that they really needed to enjoy them, but the unspoken rule stopped me from speaking to any high schoolers. the school looked nothing like Mount Si, more like a castle or something, there were giant stone staircases inside, going up the walls, which were probably 80 feet high. I stopped by the kitchen on my way out, and there were about 100 people in there, and thousands of pizzas, and they looked like they were shooting to cook them all. I started cooking these pizzas that had a weird slogan, I kept repeating it in my head as I cooked them, but I can't remember it now. It had something to do with the fact that the cheese on top of them spelled out the word 'Zoom'. Every time I opened the oven to put a new one in, I would burn my elbow on the inside of the glass, and if it took me more than one try to get the pizza out of the oven, I had to keep repeating the slogan, but in such a way that if i got the pizza 30% out of the oven, I would say 30% of the slogan, then start over if I had to take another shot at getting the pizza out. Difficult to explain, but I hope you understand. I had to repeat portions of the slogan a lot, since I was really struggling to not get burned by the oven, it always took me a few tries to get it out.

Weird School / Peeing by the River / Jesse's Motorcycle / Babysitting

Weird School --

This is the first one I had, and I don't remember a lot of it. I was at some school that was - in my mind - Mt Si, but it looked more like an airport. It was enourmous, and there were retail stores and arcades, and things like that all around. I remember looking for Ms. Lucking's class, and knowing that the classrooms were the doors that were on the carpet, the rest of the place was linoleum. I was looking all over for her, and getting a little worried since I couldn't find the door. I remember asking Owen where her class was, and he was incredibly unhelpful. Once everyone else found their classes, I headed down to the arcade, planning to tell anyone who asked that I was looking for Ms. Lucking, but really I knew she wouldn't be at the arcade. Oddly enough, she was at the arcade, and I told her how strange I thought it was. She didn't speak a word.

Peeing by the River --

This one was very short. Grayson and I were down by the river outside my house, except it looked completely different. There were tropical plants everywhere, and I was climbing around on a bunch of vines and stuff, watching Grayson look for something in the sand below me; he was digging around and getting pretty bent out of shape about not finding whatever it was he was looking for. At some point I had to pee really bad, so I started going, pretty near Grayson, which I was unhappy about - I didn't want to hit him - but he was so focused on finding this thing that he really didn't give a rip.

Jesse's Motorcycle --

Jesse's house was kind of like Gerard's house in this dream, except I think my house was next door, and if you went past it, you went up a very steep grassy hill covered in snow for about a half mile until you came to a cul de sac. Jesse had a mexican friend who had built a custom harley - it was a harley on the front, connected to half of a volkswagon beetle, so it was like one of those trikes that you see people riding around. We all thought it was great, and I went for a ride in it with Vernon, then I took it up to the cul de sac, and almost lost control coming back down in the snow. I went to tell Jesse that I had brought it back safely, and he was having some kind of a party, everyone was sleeping outside in tents. Jesse showed me his tent - it was half open, very dirty inside, and he had ice forming all over his sleeping bag. I told him it looked like a terribly uncomfortable place to sleep as he climbed in apparently for the night.
I went next door to I think my house, and there were probably fifty people running around in the snow nearly naked. People including Bryan Wylet, Vernon, those ugly twins that Bryan used to date or whatever, etc. Bryan had I guess cut his finger, and both his and my mom were fretting over him, asking him what he wanted to disinfect it with. He said he already had disinfected it with blue food coloring, then he said, "Wait; blue food coloring isn't an antiseptic is it?". No one there seemed to know, so I chimed in and kindly told them that no, it was not.
Now the location of the party had moved to some bar, where everyone was underage and everyone else knew that, but there was still plenty of drinking going on, I don't know how this was happening. I also think it was a school-sponsored event, which makes even less sense that the underage drinking was being accepted. I remember Owen and I talking about false summits, and by doing this we were somehow mocking what this really ugly girl had just said. I don't know what the connection was, if there even was one. Then the bartender, who I guess we were friends with, held out a set of keys for someone to hold onto for some reason. No one went to take them, so I did, and everyone groaned about me being the one to have such a responsibility. I got pretty heated, and started prodding them as to why I had such a reputation, I would have thought I would have been the first choice for such a responsibility. I was pretty pissed about it. At some point someone tried giving me a tattoo on my back, which I resisted, then listened to the ugly girl tell about the tattoo her boyfriend tried to get on his back, but she had to stop him.

Babysitting --

I guess I was supposed to babysit Emma - Carrie and J.B.'s daughter - for about three days while they were out of town. I was excited to take over the house and live there, because there was nothing inside, and there was no child to be seen. I basically just got to move in for free. The house was like a storage unit, it had a blue rollup door on one side, but the other side had a real door, and a fence with a gate. I decided to leave the rollup door permanently closed, even though it was on the front of the house, and just use the regular door. I was outside locking the gate with some weird green contraption that had a picture of a scantily clad woman on it and a skateboarding logo. Some people pulled up, all I know about them is that they were people from high school who were very religious, and I remember knowing that they were religious, and being very intimidated by them for that reason, because in my dream that also meant that they were very hardcore and mean and rebellious and would most likely hurt me given the chance.

The Concert / Halo Dreams

Grayson and I were in a band together, and we were supposed to put on a concert for an auditorium of about 100-200 of our old classmates from high school. We had already put on one concert, and we were very successful. While at this auditorium, a few different people came up to me and told me they really liked our music. Also, we were called Pedro the Lion, and we kind of were Pedro the Lion, except we wrote our own music and had none of the band members from Pedro the Lion, (This made sense in my dream). This concert was kind of a battle of the bands type thing, so i was completely confident that we'd be the best ones there by far, but I still remember being very nervous to perform, and thinking that I shouldn't be this nervous to perform for a couple hundred people that I already know I don't really like. Right before we were about to go on, I for some reason realized that something had gone wrong with my acoustic guitar, and that I had to run home to fix it. Our band was about to go on, and I knew that every minute I was gone was a minute the audience had to wait, so I was in a frenzy. I don't remember driving home, or what I did to my guitar when I got there that was so important, I just remember pulling back into the auditorium parking lot, which looked just like a strip mall parking lot, with a target and such, and almost hitting a few different people while frantically looking for a parking spot. I ran back in the auditorium, and went backstage to enter onto the stage with my bandmates, who were already standing there, ready to perform. I got back there, and took about three steps onto the stage, when I realized I had forgotten to put the strap on my guitar. I ducked back backstage again, and as I was putting it on, realized that my pickup and sound hole were covered with masking tape. i set about peeling it off, but at this point I had taken just a little too long, and the people running the concert kicked us off to let the next band get ready. I felt terrible, and apologized profusely to Grayson, who wasn't upset with me at all, and seemed to completely understand that I had done everything I could. We talked about trying to trick some other auditorium staff member into thinking that we were the next band that was supposed to go on, but I guess we never did.

In the next dream, i had evidently been afflicted with a strange sleeping disorder, and I was sleepwalking a lot. I guess I was sleeping in this bike shop or something, because every time i would wake up from a sleepwalking episode, I would be in this retail shop, and all my friends there would tell me what I had just been doing, except they always told me that I had just had another, "Halo Dream". My dreams, I remember, had nothing at all to do with halo, and rather were about skateboarding, but I never corrected my bike shop buddies. In one of the dreams, I crashed and hit my chin trying to do a new skateboard trick, and when I woke up, they told me I had done something weird with my mouth, and I knew it was because I had hit my chin in my dream. I told everyone in the bike shop that I was going to come up with a new skateboarding trick. This hushed everyone, since trying to add to the existing trick repertoire was apparently very taboo, and most respectable skateboarders would never even try. I didn't tell them that I was getting trick ideas from my dreams, they still believed they were halo dreams, but I knew that these dream tricks were super cool and I could hit it big with them. The fact that I could be monetarily successful from creating a new trick was synonymous with a cure for my halo dream syndrome in my dream. Nothing really ever came of this situation, but later I was sitting on a couch that was ridiculously modern looking, like those crazy pieces of furniture from that SNL skit, and listening to some guy talk about some idea he had that could help cure my halo dream affliction. Everyone was there listening, and it was clear that the entire town was worried about me, and wanted to help me get rid of my halo dreams. I still never told them they were skateboarding dreams.

Gerard's House / Mini Storage

Both of these I should have gotten up to write down sooner, but of course I deemed them unimportant and uninteresting, only to regret it later. So I don't remember nearly all of them.

The first, I was at Gerard's house, but it was nothing like his old house in Fall City or an apartment in Hawaii, it was just a random house, where nothing was at 90 degree angles, the room I was sleeping in was like an oval shape, and it was more of a TV room than a bedroom, from what I can remember. I remember Gerard falling asleep, and me trying to leave really quietly at about 2 in the morning, for some reason, but halfway through the garage I realized I left everything that I brought with me inside, so i crept back in, and saw a strange man, about 30 years old, sitting on a couch watching TV. I wondered who this guy was, but when I looked away then looked back, the guy had changed into JM, but I justified this by telling myself that I had just seen him wrong the first time. Anyway, after this I think we kind of stopped worrying about being quiet and had a party or something.

The second one involved me working down at the mini storage with about 4 other people, including Alex Haas and Lindsey Beach. Alex was wearing a totally bizarre T-Shirt that had two heavy collars, one on top of the other. The shirt was light blue, the first collar was dark blue, and the second was gray. I left Alex and someone else with the golf cart out by the RVs to do something, while i went in toward the center of the complex to do something else. At some point I realized that I had about a half hour of work left, and that what I was doing would end up earning me 6 dollars, since it was about a half hour of work. This outraged me, because I saw the work I was doing to be worth much more than 6 dollars, I told Lindsey, "If someone said, 'Hey Dan, do this for me, and I'll give you six bucks', I'd say screw you!". With that I went back to the office to put away the weedeater and go home. Lindsey and three other people got frozen to the ground outside the box unit, and were telling each other and me that there was no way Alex Haas would help them get unstuck, because they lived in dorm rooms, and Alex I guess didn't approve of such things.

Civil War Killers

While trying to host a civil war re-enactment at my house, a couple of guys snuck into the scene and started killing people. I fled to Italy, but they followed me onto the plane. Now all the plane passengers and the killers are on a school bus floating in the middle of the ocean, and both the killers have shrapnel in their faces, and are bleeding profusely. One man kills the other for allegedly going "soft", and then i escaped, leaving the other passengers to a fiery death and feeling no remorse.